ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff.

i'm so stressed out about everything. and most of it isn't even about school! you know, this past year has really sucked the big one. it would be nice to catch a break once in a while.

oh well..

k what's the deaaaaaal

bigtime over school. like so bigtime i'm considering dipping early instead of finishing.

that's a lie.

anyway i'm ready to forget first year anyway. i'm massively behind in credits...well not massively but i dropped a course i should have kept. but i would have failed it anyway so it's no big..but it's a little nervewracking to say the least.

going to the dominican april 21st. soooo happy to be on a beach. literally i'm just gonna sit there and no absolutely nothing productive except sip my drinksss. and that is all.

nothing else to really say. i've been stressed lately, but who hasn't ?

so i'm legal right..

Yeah. I sort of had other things to worry about in my life since I got this blog. Good thing only like one person reads this or I would have felt guilty.

So Alyssa did her New Years Resolutions...I thought it might be a good idea to start some of mine. Even though really, I'm not going to follow them at all. But whatever, I'll write them anyway.

1. DEFINITELY NEED TO RELAX. Like, I overreact all the time. I need to start going with the flow...this is my biggest resolution for sure and I might actually try to follow this one. Whenever I have plans or an idea of how something should be and it doesn't go my way I get all bent out of shape. I mean, sometimes it's good to have my way - esp. with the boy if you know what i mean, but sometimes it's okay to not have my way.
2. This one will have something to do with working out. I need to start more. Even if it's just a jog. Ok so let's say I have to jog AT LEAST 2 times in one week. This might not happen though.
3. EAT LESS. Holy crap I eat so much now. It's brutal. My mom buys a frozen pack of Jamaican Patties and I'm eating those things for every meal. I actually had this one for breakfast this morning.
4. Stop arguing. With like everyone. But mostly with Kyle. It's working so far I think. This one I will follow.

That's all for now. I don't wanna go making all these crazy promises to myself. You know only two of these actually mean anything to me.

Oh, and I turned 19 too. So I'm legal to do everything. Too bad I don't drink that much!

Peace.

it's right around the corner..

School sooooon.

I wasn't really panicked until somebody spoke to me telling me all of the things that they still have to buy. That's when I realized that I still have to buy a lot of things as well...books, a frosh week kit, bus passes...the list never ends with this big empire that they call university.

On the topic of frosh week, it's really something that I am not too excited about. I'm pretty shy...it's hard for me to jump into a situation where I don't know anybody and have a good time. I know that frosh week is there so you can meet people and whatever, and I'm going to go to some of the events (not all..I would die probably). I just don't see the fun in it. Hopefully my opinion changes as I come closer to it...but it probably won't.

Gotta get a job...get some experience for my con-ed program...

Lots of responsibilities I'll be covering in the next few months. I'm kind of freaking because I don't know how I'll be able to handle it all.

I'll survive. I guess.

been a while...

Lots of things have happened in the past month. I haven't really felt like writing...still don't kinda. I guess I do this thing for myself. I'm starting to get used to the idea that I'll be entering university soon...I'm kind of nervous, to be honest. It's weird entering the next phase of my life...daunting. I'm a little bit worried about how it will strain relationships that I have and how I'm going to come up with money and whatnot. I think in the end everything will work out..things are going good so far. There's been a lot of support from my family, my boyfriend and my friends lately that help me deal with the task of entering university. I'm excited for it...I think I'm ready for a change, that's why.

I had to go through death once again recently..my beloved great grandmother whom I called Nonna Peppina, passed away at 90 years of age on Friday, July 31. It's a bit weird not having her around..she was old, but 100% healthy until the day she died. She was a force to be reckoned with..not many people can say that they knew their great-grandparents, I was lucky enough to know her until I was 18. I think now that she's gone I realized what she represented. She was 90, lived alone until her husband died 14 years ago..she's really an inspiration for me and my family. It's sad to leave her, but I always say that everything happens for a reason and I think that gets me past the pain of losing a loved one more than anything. Something good will come of sorrow..I know that much for sure.

In the past month, I've met new people..not really done new things but I really like my life at the moment. That's really all I have to say anyway...I'm happy.

And I got a new laptop for graduation from my family...bombb!

dear jon...you suck!

I am so thoroughly over Jon and Kate because of this picture and others like it. I used to really like Jon! He was the funny one, but now he's being a MAAAJOR loser and I hate that he is parading his little 22 year old girl all over the world while Kate, his WIFE since the divorce is not yet finalized, stays home and takes care of the kids. He's disgusting me!

Jon, for the sake of everyone who has ever known or knows you, stop wearing the Ed Hardy clothing..you look like a major douchebag and nobody is impressed that you have shirts with flaming tigers all over them. Drop the loser girlfriend and stop smoking with her. You're NOT COOL. You have eight kids under 10 years old, you're like 35. Not to mention, like five days ago you were on your television show complaining about the papparazzi and now you are out in the open parading a new, twisted relationship in front of the same papparazzi? Get over yourself!

Damn. So disappointed in him. I'm done with this show..it's so awful now.

"ain't nothing strange about yo daddy"

I'm really, really super-into Cake Boss and LA Ink right now...I think I've officially passed the Jon and Kate Plus 8 junk and I feel kind of relieved. I still like J&K, but I felt that most of this season has been centered around the adults and not the kids..and since the show was created because they had 8 kids...it just didn't make sense. So, in light of them pausing in their season, I have switched shows :) and now I watch Cake Boss which is fine with me. I like cake..they make cakes...they're funny..and there are no sketchy kids or adults trying to famewhore. And LA Ink I've always liked, but the new season started on Tuesday or Wednesday. Good for me. Bad for Jon and Kate.

I haven't posted in a while because I haven't really had anything to post. My next post actually might be ones with pictures because my four year old cousin is actually staying over Sunday night..I think Sunday we are taking her to the Bowmanville Zoo, and then Monday I will take her to Wonderland with a couple other people. I like her. She's pretty witty and quick for a four year old, and she's cute. Yeah whatever, I like to hang out with kids. So what?

I guess I am partially obligated to comment on the Michael Jackson memorial service...I thought it was beautiful, and I was really happy with how it turned out. I LOOOVEDDD: Shaheen Jafargholi, the English kid who sang "Who's Loving You"...amazing!!, Stevie Wonder made me tear up, Jennifer Hudson because I love her no matter what she does and Brooke Shields', Berry Gordy's and Al Sharpton's eulogies. I thought that these were the only heartfelt performances out of all of them..OHH annnnd his daughter Paris speaking to everyone. I like things that seem genuine, and these seemed veryy genuine and I thought they were well suited for a memorial as public as his. However..I did not like Usher's performance...get over yourself. I found it disturbing that he took the grief that far...even MJ's own daughter didn't cry as much as Usher and that was annoying to me. I hated the "We are the World" performance at the end because a bunch of randoms like Tyrese came on the stage and sang..like did MJ even know Tyrese?? Whatever. I have a huge dislike for John Mayer, and I don't understand why the fuck he performed. I'm sure other things will come to me, but for now that's all I can think of.

Overall, I felt that the memorial service was really well put together but at times it got way too personal. I think I was creeped because it was televised..either way, it was a nice tribute.

And I don't like Usher now, in case you were wondering..hah.